my new year

2014 was good. Really good. If you don't remember, and you probably don't, 2013 was a bad year for me. At the beginning of 2014, I had a very good riddance attitude, and when I really started to think about it, I started to realize that might of been what made 2013 so sour for me. So in 2014, my goal was to look for the blessings in my life. And when you start looking, they can be pretty easy to find.

It might have been made a little easier for me this year since I graduated from college, spent a summer doing nothing but playing, and got my first "big girl" job, but I'd be lying to myself if I didn't think that I went through some really hard things this year. Really hard. All of those great things happened but I also faced the uncertainty of finishing school, had my heart broken, had a hard time finding a job that I was truly excited about, had bad spikes of anxiety, and struggled to figure out what I was trying to do with my life. 

It seems like when I look back, the positives were easily balanced out by negatives, but I didn't want to have another 2013 (seriously I guess 13 is an unlucky number). I didn't want to end another year feeling angry that a whole 365 days of my life had passed, and I couldn't find any redeeming qualities, and this is when I decided to swap out the word lucky for blessed. This has made all the difference. Nothing in my life that is good happens because I was lucky, it is all because I am blessed, and nothing in my life that is bad happens because I deserve it, but because I need to learn from it. 

2014 was wonderful, and I know that I haven't peaked yet, so here's to 2015 and all it has in store. Here's hoping that I am not doomed to a bad year, good year, bad year pattern, and it just keeps getting better instead.

May your year be not lucky, but blessed.
peace. love. and 2015.